Dynamic Duo

Teachers and Parents Working Together

by Jennifer Bonn

Many parents don’t know the best way to team up with teachers to ensure the success of their children. The best scenario is when teachers and parents communicate effectively and form a united front to be the child’s and each other’s advocate. The teacher needs the parent’s support and the parent needs the support of the teacher.

Parents need to teach children to be accountable for the choices their children make.

Nancy Anderson is a parent of two children in Cobb County public schools. She says that she is frustrated when she hears stories of parents who make excuses for their children instead of teaching them that choices have consequences. An example of this might be when a child forgets that day’s homework; the child should have a consequence without the parent stepping in to find an excuse for the child. This helps kids learn accountability.
As a teacher at Kennesaw State, I am surprised by the feeling of entitlement among some students. There is sometimes an attitude that a grade should just be given to them without their having to work for it. Teachers need parents to reinforce the idea that our specific actions and choices have consequences.

Teachers want the best for your children.

Jillian Cosgrove recently worked as a counselor at Mount Paran Christian School, a private school in Marietta. She wishes parents realized that teachers and parents are on the same team. Both groups want the student to succeed, so it makes sense to work together to make that happen.
Amanda McCray Jones, who previously taught 1- to 4-year-olds, wants parents to know that teachers want to be the child’s educational warrior. She also wants parents to know that when a teacher says that there is a concern about a child, the teacher is not trying to find fault with the child, but instead is trying to improve something that may be keeping a student from learning.

The more we know about the child’s situation at home, the more we can serve the child.

This does not mean that teachers want to intrude on your family’s privacy. Rather, they want to know anything that will help them best serve and understand your child. For example, let them know when your child is going through a difficult time. Let them know if you suspect your child has a learning difference that has thus far not been documented. Let them know if someone in the family is going through trauma, such as if a close relative is having surgery; that student may not be able to perform well on a test.
“Students spend seven hours a day in the classroom, but it is often the other 17 hours away from school that can serve as a hindrance to a student’s readiness to learn,” says Joseph Yurchak, who teaches fifth grade at Atlanta Public School’s Cook Elementary. “It is so helpful, as a teacher of fifth-grade students in a low socioeconomic community, when parents inform me of factors outside of school – whether financial difficulties, family relations, or any of the other many issues that surface. That knowledge allows me to facilitate relationships of both academic and social support for my students and their families, as well as operate as a leader in the classroom who is understanding of my students’ lives outside of school.”

Teachers love to hear “thank you” when they deserve it.

Most teachers arrive early, leave late and continue to work after they arrive home. Teachers often take on a second job in the summer while also preparing for the next school year and attending professional-development sessions. We often expend so much energy on our students that when we arrive home to our own children, we might not have much energy left for them. An occasional “thanks” can make a huge difference. We are like everyone else, we just want to be appreciated.

We need your help.

Teachers appreciate help in several ways. Most teachers use part of their own money to purchase supplies, so donations to a teacher’s wish list are always appreciated.
Parents volunteering in the classroom are always welcome. Assisting with special events is also a great way to help.
Do you have a special talent that your child’s classmates might enjoy? Or perhaps a special connection that could allow students to enjoy something special? Your time will be valuable to them.
We also need you to back us up when we tell you about issues that surface. If there are behavioral problems, they can sometimes be solved when the parent speaks to the child and lets the child know that the behavior is not acceptable.

We need parents to be teachers too.

You are teaching by example in everything that you do, but we also need you to practice what we have done in the classroom. Check agendas and see if there are papers to fill out. Help to organize and establish regular routines. Read with your child. You can teach vocabulary, grammar, and develop listening and early literacy skills. Talk about the plot as well as the sound of words. Go to the library and share books or do the same thing at the local bookstore.

Being absent from school is a problem when it is not for illness.

We need to have our students in class consistently to teach them well. We understand that illness is going to keep them out on occasion, but please do not take them out if it is not for a good reason.

Remember you are just one of many parents.

Teachers need to serve many children, so although your child is super special, understand that teachers don’t always have a lot of extra time. They appreciate it when parents are reasonable with requests. If you send a 10-page email with a dozen items and requests and the teacher tends to all of them, do not send another email three days later with the same questions and requests just because you deleted the email and forgot the answers.

It’s not always about the A.

We can become too focused on the A grade as an assessment for success, but teachers would like students to focus on learning for learning’s sake. It is an amazing thing to see a passion for learning ignite within a child. It is not nearly as wonderful when a student is chiefly consumed with the grade they will get, and it’s sad when a student expects to be given an A without much effort.

Let your child make mistakes.

Homework gives teachers a chance to see where students are struggling. Parents can guide and explain concepts, but they should never do the homework for their child. Sometimes children learn more from their mistakes.

We appreciate you.

Teachers know what a hard job you have as a parent. Teachers appreciate the work that you do with your child. If we can find a way to work together toward the common goal of student success, we will become an unbeatable team and everyone’s life becomes easier, and the overall school experience becomes more positive.